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Ren and Stimpy's Secret Club
Ren and Stimpy's Secret Club is a segment that is used in the second season of the series during the Spumco era of the Ren and Stimpy Show, however, it was only used in only one two part episode, Stimpy's Fan Club, but with a female character added in the segment. The writer of this segment is unknown. Transcript (The segment starts with Ren controlling the TV set). Ren: (demonic voice) At last I have control of your TV set! Are you receiving me? (regular voice) Welcome to our secret headquarters. Stimpy: Thousands of miles below the Earth's crust. Ren: 'Shut up you fool! How do we know we can trust (looks at the viewers) them? '''Stimpy: '''We can make them take the oath! '''Ren: '''Perfect! The oath! (to the viewers) Put your hand on the TV screen, (Stimpy puts his hand on the TV screen) and repeat after me. "I do hereby promise only to watch The Ren and Stimpy Show, (starts to get excited) to make under-leg noises during the good scenes, to wear unwashed lederhosen, every single day, of the rest of my life! That's it! You're in our secret club. (to Stimpy) Alright Stimpy, their okay, show 'em the stuff. '''Stimpy: '''Uh, congratulations and-- '''Ren: '(voice over) Shut up and show 'em! '''Stimpy: '''I'm showing 'em, I'm showing 'em! (takes on his TV hat; to the viewers). Okay kids, it's time for a secret cartoon. (End of segment). Stimpy's Fan Club version '''Ren: (demonic voice) At last I have control of your TV set! Is your mother there? No? (regular voice) Good! Welcome to our secret headquarters. Stimpy: Deep inside the lower intestine of a sperm whale. (Cuts away to a sperm whale in pain at the doctor's). Sperm Whale: '''Oh GOD! GOD!!! I can't stand it!!! '''Make the pain stop! (Cuts back to the segment). Ren: '(putting on his black mask) Well Stimpy, it's time to induct another member into the fan club. (scheming) Does the subject qualify? '''Stimpy: '''Well, here's her vital statistics: her name is Susan Fout, she's 15, human, from Pennsylvania, and-- '''Ren: '''Shut up you fool! Did she bring the money? '''Stimpy: '(reveals a bag of money) A cool million in small change! '''Ren: '''Ehh, she qualifies... (to Susan Fout) and now Susan Fout, as proof of your loyalty, kindly recite the oath of servitude. '''Susan: I, Susan Fout, human, promise to watch the Ren and Stimpy Show, over and over again, until my eyeballs implode, even if it goes into 10 years of reruns. Ren: '''And? '''Susan: '''I promise to memorize whole episodes and recite the lines shamelessly in unwelcome situations. '''Ren: And, and? Susan: Oh yeah, I promise to wear unwashed lederhosen, (with Ren and Stimpy) every single day, for the rest of my life! Ren: (to Susan) That's it! (unmasks himself) You're in our secret club! Step this way to the honored seat for new club members. Ren: (to the viewers) Remember, reveal what you've seen here, and we'll tear your tonsils out! (Stimpy puts on and turns on his TV hat). Stimpy: Okay kids! It's back to our secret cartoon! (End of alternate segment). Voice Cast * John Kricfalusi as Ren Hoek. * Billy West as Stimpy, Ren (Ren is only voiced by Billy in "Stimpy's Big Day"), and a sperm whale. * Soleil Moon Frye as Susan Fout. (Stimpy's Fan Club only). Trivia * This segment was used only three times. One was in season one, which they used the segment before showing the episode, Nurse Stimpy, and the second time using the segment was used was in season two is where they used it again before showing the episode, Powdered Toast Man after showing In The Army, and the third time it was used was in the two part episode, Stimpy's Fan Club, which it was used before they can premiere part two on the episode, however, another character who Ren and Stimpy wanted her to join was added in the segment, meaning this one is a rare version of the segment. * This segment was only used in seasons one and two. So it is unknown why it was not used again after the first two seasons. Category:Cartoon Segments